Booster shots stink

Normally since my trigger was over 2 weeks ago I would be able to test by now, but since I had those two extra booster shots, the last being on Friday. I have to wait until beta time, which should be Saturday but she told me I could come in Monday. Which is good b/c I am suppost to go away or bad because now I have to wait until the weekend is over, AF is suppost to arrive on Friday. I am thinking at this point it will. I guess all my hope went out the window, I do not think clomid was good for me, I am ready to start injectables, which on Thursday I have an appointment with the RE to discuss next steps. I wish I could test and see a accurate result by now, at least I would know what to expect. I think if my temp goes down tomorrow, that would be my clue. The waiting stinks and so does the booster trigger shot that makes me not be able to test early.

On another note, my symptoms are much different this cycle...

I have not had as many cramps, just pulling and pinching. No real AF cramps, I usually get a (what I call) a Period pimple 3-5 days prior to Af showing, I usually get it on my chin, but last cycle no pimple on my chin it showed up on the side of my nose (that gave me some hope last cycle), as of today nothing. I am tired, but it could be the heat, we turned our a/c off. Also I am having back pain, I get mild back pain throughout my cycle but this is different, I feel like I have a cramp. Even thought my progestrone levels made me so excited I am feeling they might not be high enough.

None of the usual symptoms of AF, or I just be making up these aches and pains in my head.

I have acupunture appt tomorrow and I am planning on asking her more about COLD UTERUS, b/c my belly (where my uterus is) is always cold, even when I am hot, but above my belly button is warm. I check several times a day, crazy i know. Plus the fluttering I get worries me AF is on it's way.

Like I said before not holding out much hope this cycle, b/c clomid did not work for me all the other cycles why would it work now.

Not sure what to write...

I am in a weird place today... I am not sure how to feel... This morning I got up and POAS (still peeing out trigger) and it was stalk white, so I was going to call the DR when I returned home to tell her I peed my trigger out can we move up my beta date to get this over with. But I went home and POAS again and there was a line. So I guess I did not pee out the trigger, in the Pee Stick Defense, I peed on two different types of pee sticks, both internet cheapies. But from difference companies.

AM pee stick: from early pregnancy tests
PM pee stick: from save on tests

So now I am wondering and had slight hope, but I know the trigger is still there, it should be anyways, I was surprised when I saw the neg this monring. My chart still looks AWESOME (thanks ferility drugs)

I also feel like crap, My Abs hurt, probably from sitting in front of the computer trying to beat my MOM on the ebay race, which ends tonight at midnight. and I am having cramps which only started today, AF type cramps.

So will POAS tomorrow to see what is brings, hoping trigger will be gone and maybe I can move up my beta. BIG FAMILY picnic tomorrow and Sunday so maybe it will keep my mind of AF coming, I just know it is coming.

bad day...

I WAS feeling alittle hopeful this morning, but temp jumped from 98.10 to 98.18 which I thought was great and I felt good, until i went in for my progestrone test. Here is the break down...

progestrone was 11 (they wanted to see at least 10 but as high as 15)
estrodial was 68 (they wanted to see 100)

so she asked me to come into the office right away and get another trigger (booster) shot to see if my levels on both of these woud raise. I asked her if there is a chance for pregnancy this cycle, she told me that if I was pregnant my levels would not be high enough to keep the pregnancy that is why the extra boost shot would trick my ovary into thinking I was pregnant and it had to work harder. I also asked if my ovary has decided to shut down bc it is over worked she never really answered me. She concluded with she has seen low levels before that ended up in pregnancy b/c they did the extra shots, so she is hoping that we caught it early enough to save it. Now when she said that my first thought was that she says I am 8 DPO while my temps say I am 10DPO so the chances that they caught it in time are slim.

I cried all the way into the DR and all the way home. I am so frustrated with my ovary and it deciding to not produce enough hormones to help me get pregnant, I am tried of the routine every cycle, I am scared to death I will never have another child, I am scared that we will have to turn to IUI or IVF and will not be able to afford that.

The really bad thing about this is now I can not take a HPT, I have to wait for my beta, plus wiht this extra shot it will prolong my cycle at least another 4 days, IF sucks. I just wanted to throw things and cry.

UPDATE #3 I am Triggered!!!!!!!!!

Funny story, I was running errands this morning and got the call from the DR. He said my levels were great my lining was OK and I have at least one mature egg ready to pop, also my LH was starting to surge on it's own. So do the trigger NOW! I was in the parking lot at the grocery store getting ready to get out with my nephew (who i was babysitting) and my DD. I threw them back in the car and drove them to my house. I told DH I had to trigger NOW, he was a deer in head lights. He said I can not give you that shot, I said no you are watching the kids while I go to my sister's work and have her give it to me. So I Texted my sister to call me ASAP and started off to her work. When I got there we went into the bathroom (she works for a small salon) all the clients must have thought we were weird, I go rushing in there and we both retreat to the bathroom. I hand her the instrutions on how to give the shot while I mix the solution. After she read it she gave me a worried look, I said I can call my friend to give it to me if you want, she insisted she would be able to do it, she said al I have to do is jam it into your butt and press down. WHOA! You can be a little more gentle then that. So here we both are in a tiny bathroom with my butt hanging out leading over the toilet, and I must say it was not so bad. She did not count she just did it. Then she massaged it (like it said in the directions) and she said I can not believe I am massaging your butt.

I did not bruise, I did not hurt at the injections site, until later today after i took a nap. It was sore. But if this will help us have a baby OK then.