Just had to share this story from the other day.
I was in the bedroom (we have a ranch house) and my DD was in the living room, watching TV so I thought. It was the day after Easter. So I am folding wash and she comes running back to me and wants a kiss "Kiss MAMA Kiss" so I lend down to give her a smooch when I realize her lips are all brown. I ask her what is on your face, in her two year old voice she says "no" and shakes her head. I ask her " did you eat chocolate without permission?" holding back the giggles. She shakes head again and says "no". I then ask her where she got the chocolate because it is clearly chocolate on her face. In the most excited voice she replies" in the egg" and gives me a great big smile. So I think she came back to get a kiss from me b/c she felt guilty, what do you think?
What a sweety.
Monday, March 31, 2008
Money meltdown...
About once a week to every two weeks (when I pay bills) I go through what I call a money meltdown. Well today I was cleaning out my purse, like I usually do when I get ready to pay bills and get all the receipts into the checkbook then I start to have a MONEY MELTDOWN. I realize we do not have any money! Then I start to panick and call DH and accuse him of taking out more money from the ATM then he should have, I start to think of all the items I have to list on ebay. I was slight nervous when I started cleaning out my purse today, but it really hit me when I had to run errands and buy dog food (25.00), my prescription (18.00), tried to make an appointment for acupuncture she is calling me back (80.00 1st visit), gas (40.00) printer ink (25.00), and food (46.00). This is where my money goes. I hate it. I guess I should get my butt in gear and start listing on ebay so I can pay my bills next month. Oh the cycle.
Saturday, March 29, 2008
Found this thought it was so true and many girls I know can relate...
What Nobody Told Me About Trying to Conceive -
That unprotected sex doesn't necessarily lead to pregnancy. (duh!) -
That my sex life would start to resemble a science experiment. -
That the longer I try to conceive, the more pregnant women spring up around me. -
That deep down inside, I can be a very jealous person. -
That one day I wouldn't mind checking my cervical fluid or cervix position to see if it is my fertile period. (no more) -
That I should have gone to medical school like my mom wanted, because I've had to do so much medical research up to now just to figure out what was wrong with me, and now I might as well be an M.D. -
That I would know more about the female reproductive system and menstrual cycle than most of the doctors I go to. -
That living my life in 2 week increments would be the normal thing to do. -
That I never knew how much I wanted to see those 2 pink lines...until only one shows up every month. -
That simply relaxing will NOT get me pregnant.
The husband has to do some work too! (don't you hate it when people tell you that!?) -
That I have no control over some of the goals I set... -
That wishing really hard for something doesn't make it happen, and staring at my BBT chart doesn't make it change! -
That one day my husband would know so much about how my uterus functions and what it looks like from the inside. -
That a pregnancy doesn't always equal a baby. -
That miscarriage is so common. -
That I would wish we had started trying to conceive earlier. -
That my friends' pregnancies would start to make me sad instead of happy. -
That it wouldn't happen the first time I didn't use birth control like I was led to believe in school. That I wouldn't know how important a baby was to me until it took so long, and I realized what I was willing to go through to make it happen. -
That family would act like getting pregnant was a competition between all the young couples in the family, and the first one to get pregnant "wins". -
That my husband is the most wonderful and caring man! -
That it is insensitive to ask people when they are going to try having a baby! They might be trying and having difficulties just like me! -
That women who do get pregnant are so very blessed! -
That I could have been rich by saving the money I spent on condoms/birth control pills, which were obviously unnecessary. -
That I would be happy to see abundant cervical fluid and tell my husband about it. -
That other people's "good news" of pregnancy makes me sad and when they tell me they have good news, I hope that they just saved a bunch of money on car insurance by switching to Geico. That had I bought stock in Clearblue Easy I'd have my mansion on St. Pete's Beach in Florida by now.
That having my period show up would make me cry, no matter whose bathroom I was in.
That it does not get easier ... each cycle is harder than the last.
That I wouldn't want to hold or see someone's baby because it just hurts way too much.
That a group of "strangers" who I will probably never meet, have now become my "best friends" when it comes to trying to conceive.
That I would splash urine on my face while taking apart an home pregnancy test in the hopes that there really was a 2nd pink line hiding in it.
That talking about sex with fellow women who are trying to conceive would be so easy.
That one day all of this will make me stronger. (it already has, hasn't it?)
That I would have NO TOLERANCE for pregnant women's complaints about morning sickness, weight gain, etc...
That no one I know would have any understanding as to how I feel.
That my temper and patience are much shorter than I ever thought.
That infertility is not as rare as I was led to believe.
That I am very bitter towards unmarried accidental pregnancies, and slightly bitter towards married accidental pregnancies.
That someone I thought to be my best friend would hurt me by saying that she was sick of hearing about my efforts at trying to conceive.
That some people just say the wrong things.
That I would be so sad and ashamed.
That when my period shows up I would feel broken and dysfunctional.
That my friendship with my real life girlfriends would suffer because they got pregnant after being off the pill for 3 weeks.
That this would be, by far, one of the hardest things I will ever have to go through.
That I HAVE to have sex even though I don't feel like it, but because my fertility monitor says HIGH or PEAK.
That people would pity me and feel sorry for me.
That I would meet such a wonderful group of people online, that I can share my sorrow, frustration and fears with.
That I would feel stupid and naive for thinking a pregnancy would occur "when it was supposed to".
That answering questions (and usually lying) about pregnancy or family plans would hurt so badly.
That unprotected sex doesn't necessarily lead to pregnancy. (duh!) -
That my sex life would start to resemble a science experiment. -
That the longer I try to conceive, the more pregnant women spring up around me. -
That deep down inside, I can be a very jealous person. -
That one day I wouldn't mind checking my cervical fluid or cervix position to see if it is my fertile period. (no more) -
That I should have gone to medical school like my mom wanted, because I've had to do so much medical research up to now just to figure out what was wrong with me, and now I might as well be an M.D. -
That I would know more about the female reproductive system and menstrual cycle than most of the doctors I go to. -
That living my life in 2 week increments would be the normal thing to do. -
That I never knew how much I wanted to see those 2 pink lines...until only one shows up every month. -
That simply relaxing will NOT get me pregnant.
The husband has to do some work too! (don't you hate it when people tell you that!?) -
That I have no control over some of the goals I set... -
That wishing really hard for something doesn't make it happen, and staring at my BBT chart doesn't make it change! -
That one day my husband would know so much about how my uterus functions and what it looks like from the inside. -
That a pregnancy doesn't always equal a baby. -
That miscarriage is so common. -
That I would wish we had started trying to conceive earlier. -
That my friends' pregnancies would start to make me sad instead of happy. -
That it wouldn't happen the first time I didn't use birth control like I was led to believe in school. That I wouldn't know how important a baby was to me until it took so long, and I realized what I was willing to go through to make it happen. -
That family would act like getting pregnant was a competition between all the young couples in the family, and the first one to get pregnant "wins". -
That my husband is the most wonderful and caring man! -
That it is insensitive to ask people when they are going to try having a baby! They might be trying and having difficulties just like me! -
That women who do get pregnant are so very blessed! -
That I could have been rich by saving the money I spent on condoms/birth control pills, which were obviously unnecessary. -
That I would be happy to see abundant cervical fluid and tell my husband about it. -
That other people's "good news" of pregnancy makes me sad and when they tell me they have good news, I hope that they just saved a bunch of money on car insurance by switching to Geico. That had I bought stock in Clearblue Easy I'd have my mansion on St. Pete's Beach in Florida by now.
That having my period show up would make me cry, no matter whose bathroom I was in.
That it does not get easier ... each cycle is harder than the last.
That I wouldn't want to hold or see someone's baby because it just hurts way too much.
That a group of "strangers" who I will probably never meet, have now become my "best friends" when it comes to trying to conceive.
That I would splash urine on my face while taking apart an home pregnancy test in the hopes that there really was a 2nd pink line hiding in it.
That talking about sex with fellow women who are trying to conceive would be so easy.
That one day all of this will make me stronger. (it already has, hasn't it?)
That I would have NO TOLERANCE for pregnant women's complaints about morning sickness, weight gain, etc...
That no one I know would have any understanding as to how I feel.
That my temper and patience are much shorter than I ever thought.
That infertility is not as rare as I was led to believe.
That I am very bitter towards unmarried accidental pregnancies, and slightly bitter towards married accidental pregnancies.
That someone I thought to be my best friend would hurt me by saying that she was sick of hearing about my efforts at trying to conceive.
That some people just say the wrong things.
That I would be so sad and ashamed.
That when my period shows up I would feel broken and dysfunctional.
That my friendship with my real life girlfriends would suffer because they got pregnant after being off the pill for 3 weeks.
That this would be, by far, one of the hardest things I will ever have to go through.
That I HAVE to have sex even though I don't feel like it, but because my fertility monitor says HIGH or PEAK.
That people would pity me and feel sorry for me.
That I would meet such a wonderful group of people online, that I can share my sorrow, frustration and fears with.
That I would feel stupid and naive for thinking a pregnancy would occur "when it was supposed to".
That answering questions (and usually lying) about pregnancy or family plans would hurt so badly.
Well onto cycle #6
I knew it was coming, just knew it. But I guess up until AF arrived I was in denial. Well she is here and I hate her. We will be starting clomid next cycle and I also plan on going for acupuncture. I do not want to out to put too much pressure on this cycle but I feel I just might do that. I have high hopes this cycle that this combo will work. However on the other hand if it does not work out I know I will be really disappointed and I do not want to got through that. I guess being positive is better then negative. Hope cycle #6 is our cycle. If it is we will be due around DD's Birthday Dec 30th!
Friday, March 28, 2008
BFN
Meaning BIG FAT NEGATIVE! That is what got this morning. Guess we are moving onto next cycle with clomid and acupuncture. Hope cycle #6 is our cycle.
Thursday, March 27, 2008
CRAMPS have started...
I am 12DPO and they have offically started, guess my period will be here tomorrow. So much for holding out HOPE.
Can I ever get ahead??
This is a reoccurring thing with me, I have way too much on my plate. Yes I am one of those people who need something going on at all time. I hate down time but as much as I hate it I always wish I had it. Since Easter is over I thought now I can get ahead on some of my things to do. Well no. Yesterday I listed on ebay for over 5 hours after work. I did get 70 things listed which is great because the end of the month is coming up and I need to keep my Powerseller Status. Now my house is a mess, as usual. So instead of coming home from work today and straighting the house I took a nap with Avery. I needed it and we slept until 6pm, when my husband woke us up. I could have slept longer. So now I am even more behind. I was going to go inventory shopping this weekend for ebay but I think I may stay home and try to get ahead, or maybe not.
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